Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Since arriving in Greece 1 week ago we've done so many things, it's difficult to know where to start. So instead of filling you in on all of our goings on, I will simply share with you "the highlights."
During our stay in Athens Zhaina was lucky enough to have a birthday celebration with family. I dressed her in one of the dresses from my childhood, a blue one that was purchased in Greece for me when I was 4, my second trip to my father's homeland. And although no one at the party was aware of this, her wearing it gave me such personal delight.
Upon our arrival a few days later in Samos, I was overcome by a sense of belonging on an Island that I've only started coming to 10 short years ago. But in these 10 years I've gone from a teenager to a full grown woman, a mother in fact. And now my Zhaina girl and I see this small Island as another one of our homes, not a "second home" as I cannot place it behind, but another home, a place where we feel our hearts can rest.
The other day we ran into a friend a the local ice cream shop and he said to me in broken english; "I saw your father with an unusally big smile last week and he said to me, 'my grand-daughter is coming.' "
As we walked along the cobblestone street hand in hand, Zhaina looked up and said, "MaMa, remember that place, that one that we went to in the mountain where we saw God, I want to go there."
and so we did.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
On this day, 4 years ago, I became a mother.
At the moment this photo was taken I had no idea of the enormity this entailed. I had been a single mom since I was 5 months pregnant, and probably naive as to what bringing a new life into the world would mean. I had not planned on having a baby at the time, but she came anyways. In fact up until the doctor announced, "you got your girl" I was convinced I was having a boy. His name was to be Angel. Instead I had a baby girl who remained nameless in the nursery for 2 days before I signed the birth certificate and introduced
to the world.
Zhaina and I have both grown together in these past 4 years. She was an extremely difficult newborn and being alone made it even harder on me. But we both survived the "4th trimester" and went on to build a strong love for one another as the months and years past.
I still sometimes struggle as a single mom, but then I look at Zhaina and remind myself that
I did that. I birthed her, I raised her, and she is pretty damn wonderful.
I must be doing something right.
Happy Birthday Zhaina girl